You are welcome to comment and discuss at the YouTube video.
Do you often feel overwhelmed by the sheer amount of self-improvement advice out there? It’s like you’re drowning in a sea of motivational quotes and life hacks, but nothing seems to stick or make a real difference. You want to build and improve yourself. Be an 8 or above, cool as James Bond, become epic. Ever wondered what separates those who merely dream from those who achieve? Actionable skill-building blueprint.
Ciao! I’m PAULIS.
As a dancer and choreographer who can lift anyone ==(pics of me lifting people; and of publishings; and of backflips and everything)==, and a published AI researcher with a Bachelor of Science from the University of Edinburgh, I’ve spent years maximising myself in both physical and intellectual realms. Whether it’s backflips, computer vision, or interpersonal psychology, I’ve long dedicated myself to continuous growth and improvement.
Today we will outline a roadmap for self-improvement. So that wherever you are on your journey, you know what next step to take. We will identify your current most important goal, and make it actionable so you can take big confident strides in that direction. Whether it be mature masculinity, becoming an 8 or above, or another milestone, let’s turn your dreams into reality.
We will delve into how to become epic through SELF-MAXIMISE and LEVELS.
This is our blueprint for growth. So you always know where to go next, and how to take those strides.
Join me on this path to becoming Good Gardeners for this world.
Ken Wilber’s developmental LEVELS.
Imagine your growth from basic survival instincts to higher states of awareness and understanding.
At the lower levels, you’re driven by primal needs and impulses.
As you progress, you start to see the complex web of social interactions and learn to navigate them.
At more advanced levels, you begin to understand and question societal rules, realising the importance of both individuality and community.
Eventually, you reach a point where you embrace the relativity of truths but recognise the necessity of informed action.
While I enjoy analysing at what LEVELS different thoughts and reactions of mine are, LEVELS on their own lack actionability. We need to pair thinking about thinking with action.
Imagine yourself as a collection of skills, each of which can be improved. You work on these skills until you can’t find anything more to enhance. Let’s call this SELF-MAXXED.
But it’s not about reaching this final point – you can’t; your goals and measures will evolve. And yet overall the general direction towards SELF-MAX remains beneficial.
Maybe you started going to the gym for those big pecs, but you continue for the physical and mental health benefits. And the big pecs. Everyone, regardless of age, gender, or level, agrees on “mm, boobies”.
The beauty of SELF-MAX is that for every version of you, there’s a clear next target to enhance your life quality. That’s all you need to start moving in the right direction.
SELF-MAX will be WHERE you go. LEVELS will be HOW you go.
WHAT you do, and HOW you do it. Capisce?
Let’s start with the WHERE and WHAT or SELF-MAX as understood and practiced by me.
Treat your life as a video game, where you’re levelling up your character.
This needs an order to avoid maxing out something useless, premature, or in a harmful way. For that let’s outline
the ARCS of SELF-MAXIMISE:
The order is inside out; from the smallest and closest to the larger impacting more people. This also mirrors JBP’s “make your bed first” rule.
Body, to self, to doing, to relation to others, to building, to teaching. The whole shebang.
Jump in on the step where you are, which speaks to you.
But mess with the order at your own risk, for fuckeries can arise
Let’s avoid creating abusive teachers and relationships.
The arcs will differ for everyone. Identify YOUR internal drive. Only that can give you the consistent energy needed for greatness.
A method to reveal your intrinsic motivation is a question:
WHAT WOULD YOU BE MOST PROUD OF 1 YEAR FROM NOW?
This helps filter goals rapidly. Would you be “most proud of” casually continuing your current path? Or is there something more compelling?
Compare the feeling of projected pride, find what sets a fire in you.
Do note: Goals can change, and that’s fine. Having a clear direction for any given moment keeps you moving.
Pivot confidently and move on.
If you’re finding this useful and want to dive deeper, I have a form linked below. You can access my free Good Gardener guide, which provides more detailed insights, and also register your interest in working with me 1-on-1. This way, I can personally help you implement the practices I cover in my videos.
Symbolic of the physical self, aka, the demigod bod. But extend this to overall physical care: hygiene, cardio, physique, sleep, diet, resilience.
Lifting people in dance choreographies drove me to heavy weights and kettlebells, while aesthetics required consuming youtube fitness and prioritising protein. Now a meal is not a meal if it doesn’t have at least 50g of protein.
But the universal principle remains:
Inspired by Adiyogi, the first yogi, who embodied exclusively ecstatic dance or ecstatic stillness, this arc is about being present and clear.
Introspection; observation; contemplation; presence throughout action.
At this stage it is important to remember we aren’t here to improve for improvement’s sake.
Be an active citizen. Engage in projects around you until you can start your own. Write your own epic, your best life.
Even silly projects will find their usefulness if done in harmony with the universe.
Enjoy people immensely, without becoming an addict.
Realise that nothing ever gets easier; live life fully now.
Embrace and enjoy the polarity of the masculine and feminine.
Presence and praise is the masculine gift that allows the feminine to shine. (I have a letter about this on my blog page)
Break free from the expectations of your parents or other authority figures.
Live on your edge, constantly stepping out of your comfort zone.
Make love with the world.
The final step, is to bring down fire from the heavens and share it with humanity, no matter the cost or sacrifice.
Put more plainly – teach.
Teaching moves the world forward and creates a community you can enjoy living in.
Start sharing as soon as you have something to share, but ideally, have the basics of the other arcs in place first.
Your body taken care of, mind clear, projects in progress, and making love with the world – my perfect teacher.
Now that we’ve set the path in order, let’s talk about HOW you walk it:
We’re stepping into the realm of LEVELS, a climb from an egocentric worldview to ethnocentric, worldcentric, and finally to the all-embracing theocentric. The path is demanding, but the vistas it offers are transformative.
When I hear levels all I want is to climb them. But I won’t tell you to meditate and reflect ad infinitum.
The path of self-maximisation is how you’ll take the biggest strides, but there are meaningful small additions you can add to how you walk the path, to gain more perspective.
unstructured mental activity and optic flow
Leave time for unstructured mental activity. Combine this with optic flow, meaning move your body through space so that the environment passes you by. This positively stimulates your eyes and brain. For me, this is taking a walk or riding my motorcycle. No music!
“why” a bunch of times
When I find my thoughts to be frustrated I ask myself “why” a bunch of times, often in writing. A few “why’s” can help break down the frustrated thoughts, adding perspective and vanishing the strong emotional reaction through awareness, or at least helping you navigate it more intelligently.
be both inside the room and outside the room at the same time
Life’s dramas can trap you in a room that is the perceived world. Some escape through spirituality, stepping outside the room. Often landing on the conclusion that earthly ties should be rejected; meditate until you die; reject pleasure.
But the room is where EVERYTHING happens. So instead be both inside and outside the room.
Inside – engage fully in life, dance with the ladies, embrace the rawness of reality.
Outside – already free, unafraid of life, awake.
Be both actor and audience, finite and infinite, freely awakened even while pressing your flesh-body against another.
Your path through SELF-MAX and LEVELS will have stages. Observing others and myself, the stages are roughly:
While some of these stages are well covered in the online space, I haven’t found much going past “integrated selfhood and clearly expressing your needs”.
Not a bad place to be, but I want the path of the mystic.
Moving beyond clearly expressing your needs, to recognising your life as a complete sacrifice, of giving your gifts regardless of recognition or thanks.
More simply – NOT BEING A NEEDY BITCH.
Are you giving like an artist who must express art, a saint who must offer compassion, a father who must provide his children {..} Or are you still a little boy eagerly performing for the sake of mom’s applause? Very little helps you mature beyond neediness more than the appreciation you want from your woman, but don’t get.
– David Deida
Now return to your next actionable step. Remember what you thought of in the “what most proud of 1 year from now” section.
Go do that.
Don’t fret too much about LEVELS. Become better, and just keep LEVELS as a fun, maybe even useful thing, floating about in the back of your mind.
In the end all your goals and plans will be achieved (or won’t be achieved) a single day at a time. This daily approach I will cover in the next video, to share how to tackle the experience of the you’s of different days not agreeing with one another; the future you not listening to the past you; the present you not caring for the future you.
Remember to check out the form linked below. You can get your hands on my free Good Gardener guide for more in-depth information, and also register your interest in working with me 1-on-1. Together, we can make meaningful progress and bring your goals to life.
Now go out there and
Be a Good Gardener.
You are welcome to comment and discuss at the YouTube video.